The Day that Was

I was supposed to be going back home today.

It was a very, very difficult decision to make, cause I have been considering and reconsidering staying on/go home/stay on/go home.

Anyway, in actual truth if you asked me a few weeks ago, i was quite certain I would be returning home.

But in the end the reasons to stay outweighed the reasons to go home, and the flight change was made.

See you in August people!

The suckiest thing is missing out on whats happening back home.

But thats life.

In the news

In today's paper an article was screaming "read me!!!" I found it amusing enough to begin with, my interest fizzled out towards the middle but it was the last bit I'm glad I stuck out for.




















Considering my recent 'copy & paste' chat post, I chuckled to myself when I saw the last few paragraphs...

























What?!?!

Now, I can't say that these exact thoughts have never run through my mind before. They have, but the answer for now is: cannot!

There are some males I know with admirable qualities and if only I could like them, things would be simpler but....I don't and that's that. I think a number of my female friends feel the same way. The problem we have though is our pool of possibilities is very small, but by taking action to explore other options then puts us in the category of 'looking' or 'desperate', something we are definitely not. 'Open' is the word. If he comes, he comes if not, I've got my back up LKP plan.

Anyway, since this article is aimed at 30-something year olds with ticking biological clocks. I think I still have a good 10 years before alarm bells start ringing- if I want kids anyway.

Ask me again in 5 years...

Inner Conflict

I got this from a christmas cracker













I think its purdy and have this unexplainable urge to attach it to something like, my phone...













But I just can't bring myself be the girl wih the annoyingly cute thing dangling from her phone.

Its.just.wrong.

Men are from God knows where...

Excerpt of a chat with a male friend. You would need to know the story of Bridget Jones to understand some of what we're talking about. If you don't know Bridget, shame on you:


Me: nope, no fun at all.... Cause its not like you are Daniel Cleaver who flirts with her and leads her on

Dude: daniel cleaver?
who taht?

Me: he's hugh grant's character in Bridget Jones
scum but is the sexy scum

Dude: ahh, right. i remember
sexy but scum
hahahhaa
but he really likes her in the end!
was kinda rooting for him actly
firth is so
darcy
so boring
safe
dispassionate abit

Me: what NONSENSE

Dude: eh
wat

Me: he does NOT really like her in the end
where on EARTH did u get that

Dude: i am entitled to have an opinion
doesn't he?

Me: NOOOOOOOOOO

Dude: he fights for her wert

Me: he is scum through n through

Dude: didn't he run back to her?
and say like u know at the end of the day - we are meant to be
flawed as it may be
that they're meant to be?

Me: oh.my.goodness. You are a gullible GIRL! He said that just to get her to take him back
she was just his bus stop till someone else came aalong
i cannot believe u culd root for him
urgh

Dude: well from what i remember
in a sort of cynical damaged way
he made sense
and though it probly wasn't true love, it was somewhat functional
know wat i mean

Me: .........
i cannot believe u jus tsaid that
u suck

Dude: like a mutually detrimental relationship which still pulls thru
somehow
eh
wat the crap

Me: have u even watched the second movie?

Dude: can't remember

Me: Tsk tsk, if that is a reflection of ur true views

Dude: wat haapened?

Me: well, they end up working together
and have to go to thailand
where he tries to seduce her
brings her back to the hotel room all

Dude: ic

Me: but he has a Thai prostitute come

Dude: hmm...
i thot i saw it
can't recall la

Me: see, the problem is tho, IF he doesn't make it about his feelings, then its fine

Dude: right, but...

Me: but he tries to trick her into thinking he really loves her when he doesnt instead of just one night stand
scum
and you're on his side
SCUM

Dude: oh, right
maybe not the 2nd movie la
where he confirms to bridget that she made the right call

Me: Mark Darcey likes bridget jones,and the famous smile inducing, awwww inspiring, melt worthy line goes "I like you...just as you are"

Dude: but at the end of the 1st one, its still open as to whether he can change..

Me: urgh

Dude: oh pls

Me: please

Dude: bullcrap

Me: ur such a guy

Dude: wow

Me: typical guy

Dude: that's almost a compliment

Me: you wish

Dude: for me
eh most guys won't remember a thing
i rmember part 1
at leasy
leadt

Me: long ago i migh have thought you had a chance of not beinging such a typical guy, but i think no, you are just like the rest of them

Dude: not such a bad thing la
girls are typically girls too

Me: yeah.... the girls who can tahan typical guys..

Dude: nice/good guys finish last remember?

Me: and i do believe that there r girls around who are the type that typical guys need
nice guys finish last cause they r boring...
nice is not the reason

Dude: of course there are they're in the majority
exactly
u can't have it both ways

Me: they dont finish last because they r nice

Dude: nice guys are sage
safe

Me: mark Darcy did not finish last

Dude: safe = less edgy
= less dangerous
= less risk
= less unpredictable

Me: i wld choose Mark Darcy in a flash
heartbeat

Dude: = less spontaneous
= less adrenaline
= less physiological hormonnes
= less successful

Me: excuse me, Mark Darcy is spontaneous, edgy, takes risks, unpredictable

Dude: yea right

Me: plenty hormones, HE started the fight for her honous
swooon

Dude: and if he didn't look like colin firth and actly lost to hugh grant in a fight?

Me: doesnt matter!

Dude: like got beat up?
sorry
wish i could believe u
really

Me: oh,too bad u dont... if the guy lost in a fight he started to fight for me, i would SO clean his wounds
especially if the guy he was fighting was a guy i caught with another woman, fiance for that matter....

Dude: yea

Me: in case u dont remember, Bridget walks into the bathroom and a pretty, slim, american lady is there NAKED who turns out to be Daniel's fiance

Dude: but if he wasn't good looking like colin firth
wat abt the naked lady?
can't remember

Me: looks really dont matter that much.... if colin firth wasn't the CHARACTEr he was, he would not be that attractive
i mean, D-u-H...

Dude: but u have not addressed the poiny
point

Me: put Colin firth n Hugh grant, hugh grant is wayyyyyyyyyy better looking

Dude: if he had the same character minus the looks
of course
but colin is
presentable

Me: we r talking about character

Dude: can take out
no i am not
u are
colin looked like seth rogan

Me: aiyo, even looks, presentable is good

Dude: hah
with character

Me: a person who does not shower?
who is seth rogan?

Dude: u'd would NOT go got him

Me: i WOULD TOO

Dude: just think of a non-showering man

Me: true, non-showering for no good reason

Dude: if only girls could do wat they say

Me: or didnt brush teeth

Dude: watever

Me: or had 1 glass eye

Dude: bad looks

Me: eh, please la

Dude: imperfect hygiene
bad looks

Me: imperfect hygiene is ok so long as its not LAzy hygine
there is a difference

Dude: like borayt
borat!
how?

Me: and i cannot believe u can say i go for looks

Dude: nice character all that jazz

Me: i never saw borat

Dude: idiot
like mr bean
there u go u brit

Me: hello?!?! thats where things like compatibility n attraction do come in

Dude: no looks only

Me: there was that girl who loved MR Bean what

Dude: he doens't acy stupid
act
but just looks like him
nice guy

Me: he was just too dumb to realise

Dude: i mean YOU!!!
pls la

Me: hahahaha, ok ok

Dude: u're being a squat
colin firth is a myth

Me: Looks wise, i'm not so
bothered
i would love to get someone attractive
i wont lie,

Dude: that's why awesome great guys can be single while squattier ppl can be on the road to M...

Me: but i am grounded enough to know that substance is worth more than packaging

Dude: and u're going to give that crap abt chemistry and attraction
but that's just it
some guys are NOT as awesome as others

Me: hahahaha

Dude: less awesome ppl can generate attraction or chemistry better
coz its NOT about character

Me: no, i disagree

Dude: its about squattier things

Me: my cousin is married, she is younger than us by the way, and her husband is a nice, quiet man...
and he's lovely
i think we are on different levels

Dude: thats sweet, good for her

Me: and she loves him, not because he i edgy or good looking etc etc
If i were to meet someone , get to know the person, character def. is what i wld be attracted to
and its not like i'd be attracted just like that *snap fingers
i'd be even more weary and guarded if the person were attractive

Dude: that's the prob
the attraction bit
great that ur cousin saw/got past it
but to get to attraction without the friends thing getting in the way

Me: wahhhhhhhhh, what nonsesne "got past it"

Dude: that's the difficulty
no, not in the got past it like immune to the unsightliness of bald head

Me: thats where i say, if its meant to be, its meant to be

Dude: but it never got in the way?
haha
not sure how to explain

Dude: since chicks are all abt character
how come they don’t go for the nice guys?

Me: that s NOT what i said
i said, I - EYE - Me would rather go for characer

Dude: look even if u are not meant to be, doesn't mean its not possible to be attracted

Me: u give me a Mark Darcy or a Daniel Cleaver , i go for the mark Darcy

Dude:AN UGLY DARCY
WHO LOOKS LIKE MR BEAN

Me: can u even remember what [insert ex's name] looked like ar?
hahahaha
he is pretty unatractive
he was pudgy - or plump - or some say fat
he has really crooked teeth
he got small eyes

Dude: [insert ex's name]?

Me: so what's your point about me and looks?

Dude: see no character, no looks but not NICE guy
still can work
u're attracted to squats

Me: hahahahaha....how was [insert another name] a squat?

Dude: that's just it

Me: ur theory sucks

Dude: morons attract chivks
he was a squat
super squat

Me: WHAT?!?!?!

Dude: then he became WUSS
pussy
then died

Me: what about him was a squat?

Dude: a tragic death

Me: he was being 'honest'

Dude: in langkawi he was still a squat

Me: he was being daniel cleaver telling bridget straight up it was a onne night stand
he was NOT a squat in langkawi

Dude: then he turned pussy

Me: i'm sorry but ur wrong there

Dude: and did the public declatation
Declaration

Me: he never declaed anything, he just sang a song

Dude: just tragic la he
pls la

Me: you, my dear friend, are an idiot
u are talking rubbish

Dude: nope
u know somewhere i make sense
even tho i don't really know how
haha

Me: if i figure out where i'll let u know
but i doubt it
anyway, so what ur saying reinforces my current status
cause if YOU say that i am attracted to Squats, and i'm incapable of falling for a nice guy

Dude: pls la
getting stale
it was then

Me: then all the more its necessary for me to just stay away, cause i'm bound to fail anyhow

Dude: don't need to prove me right like tha
that
and then?
for how long?
then wat happens?

Me: because the Squat guy that i'm attracted to will eventually show his true colours n then all is lost

Dude: don't be a chicken

Me: hahaha
what chicken
smart

Dude: yea, that's when u hope he's not too hypocritical
so at least the deal didn't change

Me: i gtg now, dinner ready

Dude: the scary ones are the ones who put on a show
like rihanna says
hahha

Me: and i still stand by what i said
you are an idiot

Dude: bye

Me: bye

And just like that...

the snow is gone.

=(

It was around for almost a month but just 2 days of rain washed it all away.

Glencoe

This was me learning how to ski on a dry ski slope




















Later today I'll be going skiing for real! Excited!

Wonder how many times i'm gonna end up rolling down the hill.

Fingers crossed there'll be cute snowborders to help me up...

;p

Second Xmas

Its always wonderful to receive something in the post.

Its even more special to get something when you're away from home!




















Weeeeeeeeeeee!

Was trying to figure out who it was from based on the handwriting, but eventually I just looked at the return address...


My darling Nerds
















Had a great time unwrapping each gift, laughing at some of them and puzzled by others.



















Yep, a strange collection of gifts. What does it say about me...

For those who don't know, I (shamefully) admit that I:
1. like leopard print (but not as much as the former Miss Singapore of course) and

2. love reading the super crappy/cheesy/cliche/soppy/unrealistic/lame/romantic/predictable rubbish Mills & Boon books.

It all began when I read my first copy, 7 years ago. The cafe where I was waitressing had a whole bookshelf of them and while waiting for the lunch rush, I'd pass the time reading.

Then there was a good 5years of no M&B. Simply because I could never part with RM15 for such trash... =p

Unfortunately in uni I met someone who also shared my passion for M&B, and she had a source she'd borrow from each week. Alas, I was sucked into it again, and worse! She told me of a place where I could buy them second had for Rm2.50...! RM2.50 I say!
The only not so ideal thing was the RM2.50 copies were published in the 60's and 70', so it wasn't as current as I'd like it to be.

I get really excited if while reading there is mention of handphones, computers and stuff like that, means I found a more 'current' copy.

Gah! I'm getting carried away by books my mum once told me were for middle aged spinsters...

Where was I anyway?

Oh yeah, just thinking about how lucky (blessed) I am to have good friends who know me well.




ps: Kevin, shut up your face!

1999-2009

(I wrote this really, really late one night a week ago and its all over the place)

It seems wrong that someone my age can say 10 years went by in a flash. Since when did ten years become 'flashable'?

"Not too long ago" I was a fourteen year old school girl, running back and forth between my class and the one next door (whenever the teacher was out) so I could be with my best friend, wishing i was placed in her class. That was the year of Star Wars 1, and all feared the world would come to a stop because of Y2K.

I can never realise how old music is, so I decided to stop and think about the songs that I would have listened to during the past 10 years of my life.

2000
Britney Spears - Oops!... I Did It Again
Corrs - Breathless
Robbie Williams - Rock DJ
LeAnn Rimes Can't Fight The Moonlight
- Introduction to contact lenses. One of my favourite years in school, PMR? Pftttt! Who cares...


2001
Limp Bizkit - Rollin'
Geri Halliwell - It's Raining Men
Christina A, Lil' Kim, Mya & Pink - Lady Marmalade
Afroman - Because I Got High
- Honestly can't remember anything specific for this year. Hmmm.... Decided I didn't like Chemistry? (the subject) By then it was too late, I was shingz-ed. =p


2002
Las Ketchup - The Ketchup Song
Christina Aguilera - Dirrty
Eminem - Lose Yourself
Nelly - Hot In Here
- First boyfriend, which coincidentally coincided with the year I lost all common sense. You know when people ask if you could turn back time and change something in your past? That would be the thing I would 100% do over.


2003
Evanescence - Bring Me To Life
Beyonce - Crazy In Love
Black Eyed Peas - Where Is The Love
OutKast - Hey Ya!
- My culture shock of being in boy's school with Boys School Boys and Girls School Girls. Only a Co-ed'er would understand.


2004
3 Doors Down - Here Without You
Maroon 5 - This Love
Hoobastank - The Reason
Kelly Clarkson - Breakaway
- Great times with my batch of Upper 6'ers... Then the Lower Sixers came in and all hell broke loose. Blame it on the attitude of the girls school girls and the stupidity of boys. Will never forget the song Wonderful Tonight. Ever. Unfortunately. (Though it was very sweet...)


2005
James Blunt - You're Beautiful
Green Day - Boulevard of Broken Dreams
Lifehouse - You and Me
Gavin DeGraw - I Don't Want to Be
- Posted to USM, Penang. Made a hopeful decision. Met the best roommate and had the most fun a local uni student could have. Attended a church that made me feel so at home.


2006
Nelly Furtado - Maneater
Justin Timberlake - Sexyback
Daniel Powter - Bad Day
Rascal Flatts - What Hurts the Most
- An emotionally challenging year, with a crappy ending. I was cliché personified. I hate being a cliché. Also the year my grandfather died.


2007
Leona Lewis - Bleeding Love
Rihanna - Umbrella
Fergie - Big Girls Don't Cry
Colbie Caillat - Bubbly"
- A really bad first quarter. I changed; a result of cause and effect. Couldn't be bothered with a lot of things and people. Lost something about me that I've not got back yet. RIP Snubby and Little Dog.


2008
Coldplay - Viva La Vida
Low - Flo Rida
Crush - David Archuleta
Love Story - Taylor Swift
- The end of 3 wonderful years in Penang and the start of my working life. Sorta. Not the 9-5 desk job in formal wear that i was expecting.


2009
Lady Gaga - Bad Romance
Black Eyed Peas - I Gotta Feeling
Michael Buble - Just Haven't Met You Yet
Susan Boyle - I Dreamed A Dream
- A good year, felt really good about myself. Decided to go for it and booked my flight to the UK. Figured, what the hell- I'm young with no commitments, if not now then when?

I'm happy with life right now.
(Besides a sorta major decision I'll have to make very soon; but its nothing to do with a guy so I should be alright!)


Thanks, God.

Shameless

Pic taken from The Star Online












How typical. Politicians getting a photo op.

This picture disgusts me.

You now say you condemn the very thing you condoned.

Do we really have 'Stupid' printed on our foreheads? Many still do, but many have woken from the stupor of unquestioning acceptance.

Shaking hands for photographs and offering money will never make up for the damage done.

Something you still haven't figured out yet.



(My use of the word You doesn't refer to only one person.)

1 step forward, 10 steps back

That is how I see my country at the moment.

I woke up to an sms saying that my church had a molotov cocktail thrown at it. Being 8 hours behind Malaysian time, I rushed to the computer to read up on what has been going on.

I hate irresponsible leaders.

God/Tuhan/Allah must be feeling pretty sad right now.