Dread

I go back up North on the 7th of July.
I have about 9days left.

And each pre-semester this happens, i go through my "i-dont-wanna-go-back-to-Penang!" syndrome.
I thought i was over it, but...
Really, i dont wanna go.
This is simply because i've gotten used to home again, and forgotten my Penang routine.
I'm dreading going back.

This holiday has really made a mark cause i've met up with some friends that i've not seen in ages, and it's made me so happy. Also i never realized just how much i miss them. I miss many people.

A month ago i met up a friend who told me "You build up invisible barriers. And you dont let people get close."
My initial response was- no, I'm so open with everyone.
But i know that being open and letting people get close is different.
How do i fix that... More importantly, do i want to?
No, i dont.
I've hardened myself. I dont see the point.

Yay...Dont we all just love feeling down.

















*Happy Birthday Andrea! Who tomorrow will legally become my sis-in-law...*

ps: I love Penang, dont get me wrong. When i'm there i'm really happy. Its just the transition period.

Barfday Boy

Some things change, and some things dont...

MTV Movie Awards

1992 - Anna Chlumsky & Macaulay Culkin, My Girl

1993 - Rene Russo & Mel Gibson, Lethal Weapon 3

1994 - Demi Moore & Woody Harrelson, Indecent Proposal

1995 - Lauren Holly & Jim Carrey, Dumb & Dumber

1996 - Natasha Henstridge & Matthew Ashford, Species

1997 - Vivica A. Fox & Will Smith, Independence Day

1998 - Adam Sandler & Drew Barrymore, The Wedding Singer

1999 - Gwyneth Paltrow & Joseph Fiennes, Shakespeare in Love

2000 - Sarah Michelle Gellar & Selma Blair, Cruel Intentions

2001 - Julia Stiles & Sean Patrick Thomas, Save the Last Dance

2002 - Jason Biggs & Seann William Scott, American Pie 2

2003 - Tobey Maguire & Kirsten Dunst, Spider-Man

2004 - Owen Wilson, Carmen Electra & Amy Smart, Starsky and Hutch

2005 -

2006 - Jake Gyllenhaal & Heath Ledger, Brokeback Mountain

2007 - Will Ferrell & Sacha Baron Cohen, Talladega Nights




Can you guess the thing they all have in common?


Tis the list of all the winners for the category, Best Kiss.

The ones i remember are My Girl, The Wedding Singer, and Spiderman.
I dont think the others were Omph or memorable enough, since, duh, i cant remember them.

However, i've not watched all the movies on the list, like Brokeback Mountain or Talladega Nights so... *shrugs*
From the list above, in MY opinion, the best kiss from all the winners of Best Kiss, is Best Kiss 2005

Ryan Gosling & Rachel McAdams

The Notebook.

=p

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2dIyrB02cbs















Wouldn't you agree?

(The Notebook is very similar to High School Musical in the sense that its one of those movies people feel shy to admit that 1.they watch and 2.they like! Haha, many closet fans out there, i know...)

*i caught MTV Awards 2007 last night and the host was terrible. Most of the jokes were crude, vulgar and just plain distasteful*

Chocolate Crazy

There are two things that you can get cheap at Langkawi,
1. Booze
2. Chocolates

Anyone that knows me fairly well, will know what i am a Chocoholic.

So a Langkawian told us of a shop in Kuah that sold the cheapest chocs. Its called Ismail, and its just down the street from One Stop.

From the outside already you can see that the shop is packed solid, really really crowded with people, and if you suffer from claustrophobia then you wouldn't survive long in this shop. Everyone was attacking the chocolates cause they're so cheap!

I even saw a Milk Tray and was so excited because Bridget Jones always has them when she's depressed or hanging out with her friends. However, it was RM27 for 24 little bits, so i resisted.
=(































































Anyway, after the madness, went back to the hotel room to calculate how much was the total in weight . . .















































*Note: Not all that was bought is shown here, and not all of it was ours.*

came up to almost 8kg!
Which was more than the weight of my clothes for 5days.

Terrible, i know...

I was amused to see, that even though we're in chocolate heaven, there were even some obvious Fakes being sold for the same price!!!












How dumb is that.

LangKawi Island

I had a really enjoyable time at Langkawi.

Stayed at the Holiday Villa which is on Pantai Tengah, near Pantai Cenang.

First day was spent lazing around the beach and swimming pool, lying in the hotel room bed watching tv.

Second day i got my hands on a car, and went off galavanting - first to Makam Mahsuri and then to Telaga Tujuh. The map that i had, was rather decieving, as the two places are actually not near where my hotel is. Or maybe i underestimated the size of the island. =p

Makam Mahsuri cost RM5 to go and visit, and its really nothing much to shout about. But i felt its one of those things i should visit considering the lagenda and all.

Telaga Tujuh! Hurmph!
Right, firstly, my embarrassing confession. I actually thought there were literal telaga's there...I didnt know it was a waterfall. So i wasn't dressed for it, and i thought i could just drive to the place, park, look at it and leave. but nooooooo! It was actually after a 20minute walk up a bloody steep hill and voila! The "wells".

On top of that, it started pouring rain as i was halfway up so i was drenched by the time i reached. I met a Langkawian uncle and asked him where the wells were, and he pointed to the pools of water that was part of the big fall... Sigh. I was stuck looking at the pools of water for about 40minutes waiting for the rain to stop, which didn't and so i had to walk down in the downpour.

Day three, more chillling at the hotel, went to bargain for a rental car, and managed to get a Kancil for 1 1/2 days for RM90. Went into Kuah town, saw the giant Eagle before going back to drop off someone at the airport.

Finally, the last day was spent shopping (which i'll blog about seperately) and we wanted to go on the cable car, so we drove all the way there, again not exactly that near, to find it was closed because of masalah teknikal. Gah! I was so annoyed cause my mom had been working all the days, and this would be the only 'sightseeing' thing she could do and it was closed. Closed on a Sunday, the day when plenty tourists were going there for it.

Overall, the one thing i loved about the island was how green it was. Yup, padi fields were everywhere, and dotted with kerbau's and lembu's. It was so nice to see, several time i just pulled the car over and gazed out at the scene.

The highlight would be when i was driving along with my mum when she suddenly exclaimed- "A hornbill!". So i made a U-turn and got out to look at and take a picture of the bird that had perched itself on a tree, when its mate swooped in and joined it on the tree! Two hornbills in the WILD, not behind bars, not in a sanctuary...Flying free...It was really amazing.

I wouldn't mind going to Langkawi again, but with friends, since you cant really do stuff like island hop alone.

Mythical Creatures

People seldom can say what they mean, and when they finally do manage to say what they mean, they then dont mean what they say.

Usually, people dont use the right words, and end up saying the wrong things making the right become wrong, and the wrong become wronger.

At what age do all our bubbles burst, or are we all able to maintain some floating rainbow dreams that survive the pokes and jabs of cynicism.

I wish i had some rough idea of what i want. To not have a concrete dream/goal/aim or whatever you wanna call it is kinda sad (in a way). Its like, instead of a nice big fluffy thick cloud in the sky, i have small tuffs that dissapear when the winds blow.

If only mythical creatures existed. Beautiful visions that are created in an individual's mind that you hop on and journey with as it carries you up into the clouds.

Some things are bigger than the sky.



ps: i'm back. will blog about Langkawi once pictures are uploaded.

Nice or not?

Change is inevitable.
The reason i didn't wanna change my blog template to the new layout is simply because i dont like the arrow design for the drop down on the right...
Silly reason i know, but i'm particular bout these things.

In a way though, i'm glad i did it cause finally i can upload a picture to my blog header. I tried several times to fiddle around with the html stuff, but always gave up in frustration. The new Layout is easier to play around with.

Today i'm going off to Langkawi till Sunday. Reason being, my mom's got a conference there so no harm in tagging along. However, i'll be going by myself as we didn't manage to get on the same Air Asia flight. I must say, i'm rather nervous about it. *tremble and shake*

The last time i sat on aeroplane was ten years ago, when i was 12. When you're 12, its perfectly acceptable to be jittery. I'm not afraid of the flight or crashing etc, i'm just nervous/excited because to me, its like doing something for the first time. So scary!

My mom was telling me stories of how some people end up in the wrong plane, since Air Asia you just walk to the plane yourself. Okay, i'm not so blur as to do that, but then somehow or another things like that just might happen to me.

Anyways, time for me to go pack.
As i write this its 2hours from when i originally wanted to pack. (Stop laughing WS!)
Which is also a day late from when i could've started packing. (I told you to stoppit!)
I am like Calypso, you cannot bind me with unreasonable demands! =p

Yes,I'm always putting it off till the last minute.
Bah!

Woo hoo!
Holiday!
R & R after 3 weeks of semi-hard work...


ps: Did you know that at the end of Pirates there's a post-credit scene? I didnt...

Silent Echoes

Thick mist slowly clears
A new world revealed
Affirming doubts and fears
Of the wrong fate unsealed.

Clear now in the confused head
Seeing what was once blurry
Rethinking all that was said
Nothing uttered in hurry

Far away in present distance
Visions of an image not formed
Facing bold feather resistance
And chilly stone to be warmed

Certain of the unwanted boulder
Yet understanding Uncertainty's test
Beauty shining from unknown shoulder
Where tired head searches to rest

Shelby, Shelby, Shelby.........

Yesterday was memorable. One of those days where i'll be remembering and laughing at myself for being such an idiot.
There are two stories.


No. 1

Since it was the last day of the DiGi spa, and my work there was ending, i was allowed to get a free full body massage session. So i opted for the aromatherapy oils massage. I was asked to change into a pair of shorts provided, leaving on only my underwear. Fine, no problem.
Once i was face down on the holey bed, she undid my bra and slipped my arms outta it. Fine, no problem.

However, i was not expecting what she did next. She suddenly pulled on the shorts till it went down all the way over my humps, exposing my lovely lady lumps...

ARGHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

Ok, ok ok, now's the time when you can hurl insults at my ignorance, but it WAS my first time going for a massage and no one had ever warned me about that before.
So there i was, lying stunned on the bed, really really shocked and thinking "Oh My God, is this normal?!?!?" with my bee-hind on display, when the second embarrassing thing happened. No, i didn't fart, although there were times during the whole process when she was 'kneading my buns', i did feel like farting..

She spoke t me in chinese "xi sher cha bu la la li li", obviously it was not that, but i no understanding. So i replied, "Hah? I donno... Cannot understand.." What did she do then ?!?!?! She PATTED my BUM and told me to RELAX ! ! ! ! ! Cause i was 'clenching', if you know what i mean. . . .

Oh My Goodness.... the horror. I was SO embarrassed. Thank God i'm face down. I then spent the next 5minutes in deep concentration, making sure my gluteus maximus was in a calm tranquil state.
I seriously thought the sections that would be massaged were above the waist band of the shorts, and below the end of the shorts. I was not, not, not expecting my rear to be pushed around like dough. However, i must say that once i was finally able to accept it, it was very relaxing and enjoyable, in a professional massage kinda way.


No. 2

There's seriously nothing much to do most of the time working there after the first few days, just wait for those who have made their appointments to come. So of course i would be checking out the guys who walk through the spa's doors, just outta sheer boredom. Of the whole 11days i worked there, only bout 5 caught my eye. And the last one that did, is my story no 2. Lets name said guy, Jack, since thats a very commonly used name to keep anonymity to the character.

So anyways, Jack went for a foot reflexology, he was last person in for the day, and i told my colleague Jasmine bout him and doing the usual giggly girl thing. Next thing i know, just as his massage is done, she walks up to him and CONVERSES with Jack....!!! Too Much! Bee-atch!
And what do i do ?

I bolted to the back of the hall, and hid in the storeroom.
*bows head in shame*

I then peeped out from behind, and didnt leave my hiding spot till i was sure that Jack had left.
Talk about P A T H E T I C man.... What gets me so annoyed is, i had every right, in my position there, to casually ask him stuff like, "Oh, did you enjoy the massage...Have you been before...How long have you beeen with Digi..." You know, those kinds. But noOOOooo...
I hide in a store room.

Not only that, the bee-atch betrayed my by telling him that "my friend says hi"!!!! Gahhhhhh! Who does that?!? So of course Jack's wondering who her friend is, and they look around and duh, i'm nowhere to be seen cause ?
I'm hiding in the store room.

i have no idea what possessed me, what evil Beelzebub took control and stole all my sanity away from me for those few moments. Seriously, i dunno why i was so scared. Not as if 1. i even knew the guy, 2. would ever see him again, 3. am a repulsive cockroach. So naturally, i spent the rest of the night kicking myself for being such a loser.

I'm a Dumbo.
I need to get guts.
Learn How to master the Art of Confidence.

Or at least not be so pathetic to go and hide in the store room, getting laughed at by Joseph Leong, computer geek.

Ish.

2/3

They say bad luck come in three's i think.
Dunno who they are. but they say it.

Monday my dad's car window was smashed and his radio stolen. This is the second time the window was smashed in 3 months.

Yesterday we had to put Little Dog to sleep because he was going into violent spasms. He's not been well for couple of months now, coughing and having trouble breathing. The vet put his age around 10 years old = 70 human years. I'd like to think that Little Dog is up in doggy heaven, playing with Snubby, running around as his sidekick, just like it was.

I wonder what today has in store for me.

Unless its already happened in terms of a good friend getting angry at me at 2am, my not recognizing the degree of it and making things worse unknowingly. **Let me know when you've cooled down okay, i'll not contact you till you have. **

*Bye bye Little Dog. I'll do you're tribute another day. You probably always knew you were second to Snubby, but i loved you very much as well. You were a good dog in your own way.*

Off to work.

The Finger

I'm depressed in a way that only i will know.
I was showing off my manicure today, and the people i was showing said flat out "Eh, your finger is so stumpy..." As i shrugged it off and tried to lightly dismiss it, the comments continued. Ranging from "They look as if they've been soaked in water.....bloated." to "Maybe you should do finger excercises."
There goes my happy feeling of getting a manicure for the 2nd time in my entire life.
I dont get it.
So i have short, stubby fingers.
So what?

Yes, yours will be longer.
Yes, yours will be thinner.
Yes, i cant wear rings because its hard to find one that fits.
Yes, i wish i had your long, slim fingers that are pleasing to the eye.

My grand mother had short stubby fingers, as did my grandfather as do my parents. I really cant help it.

Its hard to be pleasant when your friend pushes all the flesh on his finger to the middle and then says, "Now mine looks like yours."

I have this problem of getting really affected by what close friends say, compared to if an aquaintance said the same thing. Like, if a person i just met commented, i'd not take it so much to heart, but when my kaki say things, i am hurt. And really affected.

So yeah, to whoever that reads this, let me tell you something you may not know so you wont be so SHOCKED when you do notice my hands.
I have short, stubby fingers. Stare at them for a while if you must.

You know how we all have some parts of our body that we dont like? Well, my fingers are one of them.
How do I, myself get over my dislike for them when all the comments i've ever heard about them are negative.

By being thankful for having hands i guess.

Fraser's Hill

I'm off again, this time to Fraser's Hill for TLC's assembly retreat.
I need it.
Feeling on the low side; lacking the something that's been shaky since begining of the year.
All relationships have their ups and downs.

Camp talks are about “Understanding and Explaining the Christian Belief.”

Sigh.

Feeling a little melancholic.

Why does the world suck so much...
Earlier on i attended a public talk by an american journalist about Palestine-Israel Conflict. The stories, descriptions, and the photo's she took were so sad.
A reminder to be thankful for what i have.

During the slow periods at work, i had a lot of stare-into-space-thinking time. And i find, much of my thought still revolves around unresolved issues and unanswered questions.
Past Present Future.

Sigh.

I just wanna be green goo. Like Flubber, except not held together like jelly, but rather just gooing around on the floor like a snail.

This is such a random entry.