Judge Dread

Matthew 7

1"Do not judge, or you too will be judged. 2For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.
3"Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother's eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? 4How can you say to your brother, 'Let me take the speck out of your eye,' when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? 5You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother's eye.



There was an interesting question posed today from this portion. If B does not do sin X, does that mean is is okay for B to judge person C that does do sin X ?

A carfully worded discussion followed.

But as always, we were brought back to the context of who Jesus was talking to: hypocrites (in v5). It was hypocrisy he was addressing.

We're supposed to judge righteously. And no matter what a person does, we should not judge their actions too quickly and never judge someone's motives for you cant possibly read a person's heart.

Many time's i believe i've got Moody's eye though.

Bad.

Nothing much...

I was briefly flicking through the pics that Mun Onn took of Kenny and Fanny's wedding few weeks back, (the most anticipated wedding of the year for some) and i was moved most by this picture...
















Once again, change has happened SO quickly. Since WHEN was there a grey board thingy in church? I mean, i just left not too long ago okay...

Sigh. See where the red arrow is pointing to, that used to be MY spot for many years until the PA section grew once and one pew was gone; grew twice and the next pew was gone till i was forced to move upstairs. Tsk tsk tsk...
Like the poor squirrells that have no trees to stay in anymore that they sneak into Mr Beautiful's house and eat his fruits...


*


I have FINISHED reading the last HARRY POTTER book! Past two nights i've been up till almost 4am racing to find you what happens before i accidentally hear it from someone. Its a good ending to the whole thing, i enjoyed it and am glad that its the last book. Finally reached the end almost ten years later. I still recall it was Grace Cheok that first introduced the book to me many moons ago...


*


Yesterday was my CF's first proper meeting, and there was a really good turn out of first years! I was so happy to see the room filling up, and i hope we get it right and manage to convey the sincere warmth that we talk so much about. Kinda scary cause it's within these next few weeks where it could go either way, 50/50 chance of losing or keeping them. I struggle, knowing and wanting to be friendly/kind/warm etc, but its hard when i talk to someone that has a way of giving one worded answers or is a tad disrespectful.


*


It's my brother's birthday today. He turns 28.
Really wish i could be home. Missed last years as well, and the year before that i think. So many things happening back home without me.
Feel like crying.



Home Lyrics




No matter how many friends i have with me, there's still moments of feeling that i'm alone. Friendships fade, like old photographs. Memories of the past lie under a layer of dust, blurring it to be whatever you want it to be. Good or bad or ugly. You decide how it is you wish to remember. To the point where i sometimes wonder if it was real or i had just always remembered it to be real. I guess thats why photo's mean so much. When you look at them, its proof that it was real. It happened. No matter how much i want to forget.

La la la la la...

Well, i went to try and join a choir today, under USM. Its for an inter-uni competition so it means i'll be traveling down to Putrajaya for the 5th of August. They said maybe we'll be staying either at UPM or UM ! What fun! So Mr. Beautiful, be there ya...

Anyway, to my uttermost surprise, the dude in charge says i'm an . . . . . . . .

alto!

It came unexpected cause all this while i've been a soprano for church choir. Could Jin Ai have been wrong all these years? And the dude didn't even make me do scales. Hmmmm...Makes me wonder.
But! No matter, cause its an experience and i've got my two buddies joining me as altos, Suria and Li Yee (yays!).

We'll be singing a medley of Jalur Gemilang, Setia and Keranamu.

Am really looking forward to it!

Wanting Woes

Eve’s Sanctuary

Lie to me, o you foolish mind
Just tell me what I wish to hear
Let silence make my courage blind
So I believe in what I don’t fear

Lie to me, o you foolish brain
Just tell me the facts distorted
Let not the days go by in vain
Seeking the unreachable end

Lie to me, o you foolish head
Just tell me words of the serpent
Let the coils kill all the undead
Joy found in mutual agreement

Lie to me, o you foolish thoughts
Just take me away from the agony
Let the antidote tangle the knots
Lulled by the poison of secrecy

Lie to me, o you foolish being
Just give me my sweet release
Let truth be hidden from the seeing
As I trample on in the light.













__________________________________________


I seldom have the "want" bug.
Meaning, i've learnt long ago to accept that there are many things in life i wont have. I understand that.
But today, the desire for that want was so so strong, that it actually got me depressed.
The wanting made me have the "...if only..." thoughts. Which is somehting we all know should be avoided as it only makes one even more upset.
i had to seek therapy right away. So i went down and bought chocolates.
*sigh*

its like something yoda would say,

Want leads to desire
desire leads to unfulfilment
unfulfilment leads to frustration
frustration leads to anger
anger leads to chocolate
and chocolate leads to the dark side...

happy happy, ha-ppy

The week has gone by pretty fast.
Already nearing the end of week 2.

Happy things have happened.

Firstly, being the Number 1 Squat's Bday on the 16th. I've been privileged to have been around on his bday the past 3 years running. Kinda nice to see how he's changed, from our first year - second year and now as he's entered his final year. Many ups and downs have we been through, and should there be another Thorny Incident, i know at the end of the day, i'll still be there next year and the year after and the next year and the next....


















Secondly, i managed to get Guitar as an extra-curricular (ko-k) subject. Two two hour sessions a week. Looking forward to it.

Thirdly, i'm HaPPy to be back! Yup, a different tune from what i was moaning about couplea weeks ago, but i am happy. Settled into my room, routine getting back into gear. Friends, familiar faces and places. Happy!

Forthly, a mysterious girl was seen with a certain person in a high exco position, in Sangkar Burung yesterday around 1.30pm. Me and my fellow Paparazzi had a great time speculating as we watched the couple have lunch together. Jeng jeng jeng!
















Finally, listening to the radio makes me happy. Loving Fergie's new song, Big Girl's Dont Cry.
The lines that especially jumped out at me were the begining of the chorus,

"I hope you know, i hope you know, that this has nothing to do with you,
It's personal, myself and i, have got some straightening out to do."


Its true.

I'm good

i'm in a cheapo cyber cafe with a really bad keyboard and no time to blog so this is an email i sent to a friend:


aloha!

this is my first chance online since last friday. My camppppus is still not full wireless so i resort to a cyber cafe. which is good in a way, as i'm not rotting online unnecessarily. yes, you can send it to my penang add actually! I'd get it sooner than if u sent it to my home add.

yeah, bro's married,and i know exactly how you feel! we're SO YOUNG! but at the same time, stop and think, he's 28 years old edi...So it is right timing but still feels funny cause he's my big bro! not a married man....gah! The good thing is, they're moving into an apartment very near my house, llike 5mins drive, so its not as if he's miles and miles away.

haha, damn funny to hear about ur closed nipple...My nose stud took 2mnths to heal properly. For so long it was pus-y (my gosh, i almost spelt it as pussy which also seems correct in spelling but so wrong in wording...) and a tad painful. Some times it came out as i slept and the inner part would scab over! So in the morning i had to poke it in...... Auuuuuuooooiii!!!

what do you mean about your spiritual life changing drastically? care to elaborate?
mine's still struggling with my relationship with God. i'm in my uni's christian fellowship committee and sometimes its hard when i see otherrrs so passionate and commited and into it. Struggles indeed.

This semester i'm so darn free- 13hours a week...So far i've managed to keep my mondays and most of friday free... =) Such a bum am i. But was thinkin maybe i'd jalan jalan with my roommate who's Sarawakian and go to places i've never been to in Peninsular.

love to you and your skinny body,
shelby

penang add :
M03-5-44,
Desasiswa Saujana
USM 11800
Pulau Pinang
Malaysia

Bye Home

At this point, i'm numb. The "I dont wanna go back Penang" syndrome is so overwhelming that i've just zoned it out.
For the first time ever i'm not running around like a headless chicken packing my things.
I start my final year in uni different from many other beginings. No promises.

The first, undecided steps.
The second, familiar ground.
The third? We'll see.

I cannot say no expectations, for that only comes if there is total ignorance.

How ironic that when i finally have made peace with some of my good school mates, its time for me to leave.

Regrets that can be fixed.

Will be missing you all.



ps to Hatshepsut : *As we go on...we remember..all the times we...had together..*

=)

Cuti-cuti Malaysia ++

Laundry Basket

Last night was the first time i went to Laundry Bar at The Curve, and my verdict of it is : Bleh

Its over crowded, over noisy and over glamorous.

G - L - A - M - O - R - O - U - S

Konon. Basically its a place to see and be seen. The only reason i went was to have a last meet up with some pals, and to hear some band called Tempered Mental. Cool name, hur hur...

Not only that, it was so crowded, we stood far back watching the band, a man came over and told us we could sit over by the bar, there were two spaces. My first thought was that he was a Laundry waiter, then i realized he wasn't, but he was an uncle old enough to be my dad, and he was gesturing to a spot besides his other uncle friends. Eeeewwww....


*

Wanna be a cool robot Bumble Bee?

D.I.Y Transformers


MySpace Stuff

Josh Groban on Michael Buble's Concert

Check this out, its so funny...

Especially the first part where Michael is trying so hard to keep a straight face.

Groban’s KL gig on Oct 18

OH MY GAWD !!!!!!!!!!

I just found out,

JOSH GROBAN'S PERFORMING IN MALAYSIA!

I AM SO GOING !

Thankfully its during my study week...Hur hur - studying? Yeah,sure. Like my exams will come between me and Josh Groban.

Its at the KL Convention Centre and thats all i know...

Sigh. *dreamy smile*

Time to start practicing his tongue twisting, non-English songs

E' per l'amore che ti do
E' per l'amore che non sai
Che mi fai naufragare

I'm so excited!

Must Watch

Yesterday i went to watch Transformers.

The only thing i was thinking about throughout the whole movie was "It's so cool!!!"

Also, for the 2 and a half hours i wished i was a boy, cause i never grew up watching the cartoon. Thus making it impossible for me to know all background information that all guys seem to know.

I loved the scene where the Autobots were hiding in the backyard.

And Optimus Prime sounds like Mr. Voice on the Rick Dee's radio show.

*To enter the Top 40... More than meets the eye*

A show to be watched.

Sweet Dreams

I had my last trip over the weekend.
Me and my TLC kaki finally went for our outing that was more than a month in the waiting.
We wanted to get away from PJ, but we also didn't wanna spent too much time travelling.
So we chose Melaka , Bandar Bersejarah dan Makanan Sedap.

Amazingly, we (Samuel & Weng Li) managed to find a dirt cheap room for the 9 of us to share, at only RM100. All the more to spend on food and trinkets. =)

Basically, we spent most of the time eating and planning on where to eat next.
The Jonker Street night market was great, the atmosphere, the barang-barang... Only problem was it being so super freakin hot, your skin is perpetually sticky. Like gula melaka, mmmmm...

We went to Melaka Gospel Chapel on Sunday morning, where i surprisingly met Fredrick, an old mate who i've not seen RBS. The church is really nice, quaint and full of character. Not only that, we TLCers got a shocker when it was announced that women were allowed to share as well. So far, i've only heard of Brethren churches that allow it, but never actually witnessed it. And for me, when a 60 year old sister stood to share about Elijah, i thought it was so cool. But it was understandable, there weren't many adult males in the congregation.

Our trip was filled with ups and downs. Ups- the laughter, the fun and the joy of just being with people that can all gel together. The downs- Mr. Beautiful scuffing the front of the car with the tyre of a moving lorry, patience being tested with the conceiving directions around town and the abrupt ending of our trip when Ah San fell sick and had to go home.

Overall, it was great. So much to remember and miss.
Its times like these where i wish The Sims was real, and i could just create my own neighbourhood and have all my friends staying around me.


































*

I had a bad dream last night.

It was someone's birthday, and so i went to her house to wish her. When i went in, i was met with the cold stares of her family, a family who i knew and used to laugh with. They glared at me, ignored me and made it obvious that they didn't want me around. I hugged the birthday girl and made my move to go, but she persuaded me to stay for the celebrations which was 3days long. it was a miserable time, as whenever i met her family member, they gave me a look of disgust and wouldn't even talk to me.
I was very sad.
Many of the times i wanted to just leave, but for some reason i could not.

-End of dream-

Although of course there were many crazy dream elements involved, the dream was real. The family was real. The feeling was real.

I woke up this morning feeling sad, and wondering if it could be true.
It's something i'll never know.