Not yet.

Last week i got a call from my brother telling me my grandma is was in the ICU. I immediately had a bad feeling because the last i received news of this kind it was 2 years ago, when it was my grandfather that was in hospital and it didn't end well.

After CNY, when some Ng's went up to Thailand my grandma followed. On the way back at a rest stop, she came out of the toilet alone, didn't wait for my aunt to go together with her back to the car and in the poorly lit toilet area she fell into a drain. Her ribs were cracked, but what was unknown was there was some damage done by the ribs to her lungs and almost a week later she wasn't feeling good.

Turns out there was fluid in her lungs, bleeding that hadn't stopped because she was still moving about.

Two days ago the bleeding stopped, and she was transferred into a normal ward, but yesterday i got a phone call from my mom saying she's moved again for observation cause her blood pressure and heart beat wasn't going right.

Yesterday was the 2year anniversary prayers for my grandfather.

I'm sure she misses him terribly.

I'm so not ready to say goodbye to her yet. And she's ready to leave yet. The good thing is she has a much stronger will to live than my grandfather did, and that, i believe, will push her to get better.

There's much helplessness though, as i'm not there but i'm here.